I have sworn I wouldn't go here, but I've been writing this in my head for a few weeks now and it keeps coming up over and over again. If you think I'm writing this post based on a conversation we personally had, you are greatly wrong. I have been bombarded this year with questions, concerns, and weird looks about how we do Christmas. The last straw was yesterday. I had a doctors appointment and when my doctor walked in, to her delight I'm sure, she was greeted by my 3 children. To break the ice she immediately started asking them questions.
'Have you sat on Santa's lap yet this year?"
"Have you written him your list?"
"Are you excited that he's coming?"
It took everything I had not to laugh out loud when my three children starred at her blankly and all looked at me like, "help mom, what do I do?"
(If you would like to read about why we don't do Santa and what we do at Christmas you can read a post I wrote a few years ago here: http://3kidsnohairandfullheart.blogspot.com/2012/11/christmas-without-santa.html?m=0 )
I tried to explain to her that my kids aren't socially inept they were just looking for my cue as to how to deal with the questions because we don't do Santa Claus. She was embarrassed and gushed with an unneeded apology and then said something that made my heart sink: "So, do you celebrate Christmas?"
Celebrate Christmas?!?!
Christmas is everything. It's the reason we have hope, it's the point of scripture! The last thing we should ever remove from our lives is the beauty of Christmas! I feel immense sadness for someone who wonders how to do Christmas, if you remove the fat jolly dude!
Let's just say, my doctor probably got more than she asked for as I explained that we don't do Santa SO THAT WE CAN MORE FULLY CELEBRATE CHRISTMAS!! I'm grateful for our interaction and I hope she's still thinking about it as much as I am. I'm also thankful that my children got to witness a sophisticated professional adult sound so lost.
This is when I decided to do this. For the record, I don't judge your facebook pictures of Santa visits, mailing lists, or all the creativity you put into that silly elf thing. Not at all. I'm mostly writing this for all the first time parents that are making decisions this time of year on what the holidays will look like in their home.
Can you bring Santa and Jesus into Christmas?
I must admit that for many many years I took the whole "to each their own" approach. I didn't grow up with Santa so it wasn't hard for me to make this call, but I did have many (almost all) of my friends who did. Good God fearing families that seemed to be able to incorporate both the commercial and spiritual side of Christmas. And, I respected that.
I don't know if I changed or the world changed, but somehow my opinions have started to change over time.
Commercialized Christmas teaches be good get good, be bad get bad, a naughty and nice list philosophy of life. This has been crazy reinforced when some genius decided to charge people an extra $39.99 for an elf that you sit in your house during the month of December who will report to Santa how you behave. This be good, be better, you might not get good things if you don't follow the rules mentality is the EXACT OPOSITE OF WHAT THE MANGER STANDS FOR!!!!
I had the priveledge of being at my dad's church last week where he reminded us that the manger is directly connected to the cross. It's true. Christ coming is wrapped up in the purpose of him dying. A death that he experienced for us WHILE WE WERE STILL SINNERS!!! This is the hope of Christmas! Christmas shouts, you don't have to keep trying anymore!! In fact, any amount of trying wont ever be good enough. God is perfect and demands perfection. There is no naughty and nice list. There's a "You're sins have been covered by the blood of the lamb list"! Praise the Lord!!
What would it look like if every time a parent was going to say, "Don't hit your sister. Little elfy poo might go tell Santa you haven't been good." they said, "This is what Christmas is all about. This is why Jesus was born. He came to die for you even when you hit your sister."
Even when you're disobedient.
Even when you screamed at me.
Even when you lied. He came for you!
Then I realize that maybe we have a problem pointing our children in that direction (myself included) because it's hard for us to believe.
Even when you gossip.
Even when you lose your patience with your kids.
Even when you give back in to the addiction.
Even when you had an abortion.
Even when you were bitter and unforgiving.
Even when........ESPECIALLY WHEN.......This is Christmas!
So, can you bring Santa and Jesus into Christmas?
I would like to suggest to you if you have embraced the western, Americanized, commercialized Santa, then no, trying to do both doesn't work! How can it? It's an opposite message.
I suppose with a lot of intentional effort you may be able to mix the two. To be honest, I haven't invested a lot of my precious brain power, which seems to be limited these days, on trying to figure out how to do it. I love the idea of incorporating the story of Kris Kringle. Mostly because it's important to note that while Christ came to save you just as you are, there's a genuine response to receiving that gift that should come. Our obedience should be a direct result of our gratitude. We don't have to work to be good enough, but goodness should flow out of us as we try to glorify God with our lives. Kris Kringle is a great example of someone who took that love that was filled in him and spread it around to those less fortunate.
You may be thinking, "Geez, back off lady! We're just having some fun around the holidays!" You may be right. I might take this a little to seriously. But I do know in this world we live in we have to cease every opportunity to be intentional with our children. And, thinking back to my childhood, I probably have more memories of things surrounding Christmas than anything else. So, it does matter!
Again, I don't judge the elf pictures! I'm not in your home, and I don't know what you say to your kids. But, however you celebrate Christmas, please, don't sacrifice the glory of the manger for the excitement over peppermint poop! And, if you're just getting started on your parenting journey, it is entirely possible to remove some of the commercialized Christmas things and still have a very fun-filled magical holiday season with your children. I promise!
Friday, December 5, 2014
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
My Journey through Miscarriage
It all started like a normal Tuesday in summer. We were a little lazy in the morning and then ran some errands, came home and had lunch, then quiet time. Normally quiet time means I shouldn't hear you or see you, but on this particular day I was exhausted and opted for a movie in Mom and Dad's bed. As the characters of Frozen did their thing, a weird thought popped in my head. How long has it been? Could I? No way.....Maybe.....Now I've got to know!!!
A few hours later, my husband came home and I had to run to the grocery store. While I was there I picked up a pregnancy test and like the good nurse I am I ignored the instructions to wait until morning. Sure enough.....POSITIVE. "Well, that makes life interesting!" I muttered with a smile. We don't keep things in very well so it was quickly announced to the kids that there was another baby on the way. They laughed and smiled and my youngest started dancing around, happy that she wouldn't be the "baby" anymore. (A term she has come to loath and the others have come use frequently knowing how much it bugs her.) We notified some family and settled in for a family movie feeling shocked and excited.
A little less than 24 hours later, there were signs that there might be a problem. I wasn't too concerned at this point, however, and in the meantime, news of pregnancy continued to spread. Thursday morning I woke up feeling crummy. I really just wanted to curl up and stay in bed. However, this was a big day. Our eldest daughter was turning 6! She bounced out of bed and ran downstairs to survey her loot. As I got up, I knew things were getting worse not better as far as the danger this pregnancy was in. I fought every inkling I had, and put on a good face as I watched my daughter tear open her gifts and squeal in delight with each one. My husband left for work and again, I had to fight. I pulled myself together to get ready for Bible Study at my friends house. My daughter was really looking forward to bringing cupcakes and having a little party with the kids. Before we loaded up, I made a quick phone call to my doctor and had an appointment for the that afternoon. We got in the car and just because sometimes you need a little challenge, the car wouldn't start. My daughter started crying and to be honest I did too inside. Again, I resisted the urge to crawl back into bed and call it a day, and I phoned my friend who didn't bat an eye and came over to pick us up.
Bible study.
Not exactly the place I physically felt like being, watching baby's smile and my friends nurse while I was pretty sure the life inside of me was ending. But, that is exactly where I needed to be. They prayed over me and somehow I felt like I walking through this with an army not by my lonesome. After, my fantastic friend watched my kids while I went to the doctor to get the news I knew they would have to say. "We can't know anything for sure today." Two days later, they finally confirmed what I knew to be true, that my hormone levels had dropped and this was not a viable pregnancy.
What a weird crazy rollercoaster I was on!! To go from not trying, to having, to losing all in a matter of a few days! I was emotionally exhausted. I took each of the kids aside individually to tell them. They each had their own reactions and my daughter and I especially had a great conversation. "Will the baby come back?" she said. I responded, "Well, it's possible we may have another baby I suppose, but that baby will never come back. God had made that baby with all the information it needed to be a person with certain hair color and eye color and personality and that baby will not come back." Somehow saying those simple, matter of fact words out loud, made it be true for the first time. Really true. This was a person, designed by God that our family will never meet and enjoy. Then began my imaginary conversation with God.
Me: Why Lord?
God: You told me I could.
Me: When did I ever?......... No, I'm pretty sure that never happened.
God: You've asked me to use you. You've given me your life. You've begged me to be in control. The songs you sing in church, the prayers you pray when you give up control and ask me to take over, you've said, "use me."
Me: Yeah, I said use me, not hurt me.
God: Oh child, the fallen sinful world you live in has hurt you, not me. Yes, I am in control of that too, and yes, I chose to let you get hurt, but sometimes I have to let you get hurt to use you.
Me: Okay, I'm starting to get it, but I got to tell you, I'm a little tired of being your poster child for suffering.
God: Okay, I understand that. You can be tired. But don't loose heart, don't loose faith in me. I love you and I am in control of all things big and small. Do you really trust that?
Me: Yes.
Feeling a little bit better and a little bit more confused, life moved on. I was scheduled to go on a women's retreat with my mom and two ladies from her church the next weekend. I was really REALLY looking forward to this and I knew the time away from the routine of everyday life would be a really good time to make sure I was where I needed to be with the miscarriage. We got to the conference and within 3 minutes of sitting down I heard Noel Piper say, "God doesn't waste anything." That was exactly what I needed to hear. I know God doesn't make mistakes. I prayed that God would save the life of that child and his answer was no. I know I can have confidence and peace that that answer was not a mistake, but to take it one step further and say, God doesn't waste anything, this was a wonderful moment for me. God doesn't waste a smile, a penny given, a cancer diagnosis, or a life of a child I wont get to share. It's not a mistake.....It's not wasted!!
Once I realized this truth, I was then available to see what God wanted me to learn in all of this. My husband and I have been on this journey to be completely open-handed with what we have. Over the years through some easy and some hard (and some really hard) lessons, we have loosened our grip on more and more and pursued the mindset of "Whenever you need, whatever you need, God.....use it." This miscarriage has opened my eyes to the one thing I still hold onto the most: My kids. If it's my things or even my health that comes into question, I can be all good with that. But, not my kids!! Please, don't go there!! This miscarriage has reminded me, my kids are a gift.....a blessing.....given to us for a short amount of time. A gift given by God. This means they ARE God's. These kids are placed in our care, and we do have an amazing responsibility to them, but they are not in our control. God will do with my children what he see's fit when he see's fit regardless of sunscreen and seatbelt wearing. This doesn't mean we become foolish, this means we become that much more thankful. Grateful for the opportunity to point these tiny impressionable souls towards Christ.
I hate that it took me loosing a child to see that I need to give them up. Give them over to God, for his purposes. I know God doesn't make mistakes. And, I know God doesn't waste anything.
Also, I've realized this open handed "Do whatever you need to" mindset is not something I will ever fully accomplish this side of heaven. This is not an "I have arrived" battle. It's a daily one. Each day, I may be holding on to something that the day before wasn't too hard to give up. Each season of life will come with it's own difficulties of surrendering. This doesn't mean I stop fighting, it means I must fight more, harder, and more often. Respect the process. There is beauty in the struggle. The more I learn and grow the more I realize, God is most glorified through the struggle not necessarily the conclusion.
To our family and friends that surrounded us with love during this time, Thank you so much!! We were showered with food, comfort, and prayer. It's a beautiful thing to see the body of Christ at work and it's humbling to know it's working for me. I am so glad this information didn't stay private. How can people pray for what they don't know? How can a need be met that isn't first expressed? It opened the door for us to be loved on, and boy did people step up!
To my child, I want you to know:
Just because you weren't planned on, doesn't mean we weren't excited.
And,
Just because you were never held, kissed, or cuddled, doesn't mean you weren't loved.
And,
Just because we don't even have a picture of you, doesn't mean we wont remember you.
My children teach me things about myself and God all the time. Who would have thought a child I will never know may have taught me the greatest thing yet:
To think that every year when we celebrate my daughters birthday, I will also have an amazing reminder that these kids are a gift. Something for me to treasure, not control....and no matter what happens in life: God doesn't waste anything!
A few hours later, my husband came home and I had to run to the grocery store. While I was there I picked up a pregnancy test and like the good nurse I am I ignored the instructions to wait until morning. Sure enough.....POSITIVE. "Well, that makes life interesting!" I muttered with a smile. We don't keep things in very well so it was quickly announced to the kids that there was another baby on the way. They laughed and smiled and my youngest started dancing around, happy that she wouldn't be the "baby" anymore. (A term she has come to loath and the others have come use frequently knowing how much it bugs her.) We notified some family and settled in for a family movie feeling shocked and excited.
A little less than 24 hours later, there were signs that there might be a problem. I wasn't too concerned at this point, however, and in the meantime, news of pregnancy continued to spread. Thursday morning I woke up feeling crummy. I really just wanted to curl up and stay in bed. However, this was a big day. Our eldest daughter was turning 6! She bounced out of bed and ran downstairs to survey her loot. As I got up, I knew things were getting worse not better as far as the danger this pregnancy was in. I fought every inkling I had, and put on a good face as I watched my daughter tear open her gifts and squeal in delight with each one. My husband left for work and again, I had to fight. I pulled myself together to get ready for Bible Study at my friends house. My daughter was really looking forward to bringing cupcakes and having a little party with the kids. Before we loaded up, I made a quick phone call to my doctor and had an appointment for the that afternoon. We got in the car and just because sometimes you need a little challenge, the car wouldn't start. My daughter started crying and to be honest I did too inside. Again, I resisted the urge to crawl back into bed and call it a day, and I phoned my friend who didn't bat an eye and came over to pick us up.
Bible study.
Not exactly the place I physically felt like being, watching baby's smile and my friends nurse while I was pretty sure the life inside of me was ending. But, that is exactly where I needed to be. They prayed over me and somehow I felt like I walking through this with an army not by my lonesome. After, my fantastic friend watched my kids while I went to the doctor to get the news I knew they would have to say. "We can't know anything for sure today." Two days later, they finally confirmed what I knew to be true, that my hormone levels had dropped and this was not a viable pregnancy.
What a weird crazy rollercoaster I was on!! To go from not trying, to having, to losing all in a matter of a few days! I was emotionally exhausted. I took each of the kids aside individually to tell them. They each had their own reactions and my daughter and I especially had a great conversation. "Will the baby come back?" she said. I responded, "Well, it's possible we may have another baby I suppose, but that baby will never come back. God had made that baby with all the information it needed to be a person with certain hair color and eye color and personality and that baby will not come back." Somehow saying those simple, matter of fact words out loud, made it be true for the first time. Really true. This was a person, designed by God that our family will never meet and enjoy. Then began my imaginary conversation with God.
Me: Why Lord?
God: You told me I could.
Me: When did I ever?......... No, I'm pretty sure that never happened.
God: You've asked me to use you. You've given me your life. You've begged me to be in control. The songs you sing in church, the prayers you pray when you give up control and ask me to take over, you've said, "use me."
Me: Yeah, I said use me, not hurt me.
God: Oh child, the fallen sinful world you live in has hurt you, not me. Yes, I am in control of that too, and yes, I chose to let you get hurt, but sometimes I have to let you get hurt to use you.
Me: Okay, I'm starting to get it, but I got to tell you, I'm a little tired of being your poster child for suffering.
God: Okay, I understand that. You can be tired. But don't loose heart, don't loose faith in me. I love you and I am in control of all things big and small. Do you really trust that?
Me: Yes.
Feeling a little bit better and a little bit more confused, life moved on. I was scheduled to go on a women's retreat with my mom and two ladies from her church the next weekend. I was really REALLY looking forward to this and I knew the time away from the routine of everyday life would be a really good time to make sure I was where I needed to be with the miscarriage. We got to the conference and within 3 minutes of sitting down I heard Noel Piper say, "God doesn't waste anything." That was exactly what I needed to hear. I know God doesn't make mistakes. I prayed that God would save the life of that child and his answer was no. I know I can have confidence and peace that that answer was not a mistake, but to take it one step further and say, God doesn't waste anything, this was a wonderful moment for me. God doesn't waste a smile, a penny given, a cancer diagnosis, or a life of a child I wont get to share. It's not a mistake.....It's not wasted!!
Once I realized this truth, I was then available to see what God wanted me to learn in all of this. My husband and I have been on this journey to be completely open-handed with what we have. Over the years through some easy and some hard (and some really hard) lessons, we have loosened our grip on more and more and pursued the mindset of "Whenever you need, whatever you need, God.....use it." This miscarriage has opened my eyes to the one thing I still hold onto the most: My kids. If it's my things or even my health that comes into question, I can be all good with that. But, not my kids!! Please, don't go there!! This miscarriage has reminded me, my kids are a gift.....a blessing.....given to us for a short amount of time. A gift given by God. This means they ARE God's. These kids are placed in our care, and we do have an amazing responsibility to them, but they are not in our control. God will do with my children what he see's fit when he see's fit regardless of sunscreen and seatbelt wearing. This doesn't mean we become foolish, this means we become that much more thankful. Grateful for the opportunity to point these tiny impressionable souls towards Christ.
I hate that it took me loosing a child to see that I need to give them up. Give them over to God, for his purposes. I know God doesn't make mistakes. And, I know God doesn't waste anything.
Also, I've realized this open handed "Do whatever you need to" mindset is not something I will ever fully accomplish this side of heaven. This is not an "I have arrived" battle. It's a daily one. Each day, I may be holding on to something that the day before wasn't too hard to give up. Each season of life will come with it's own difficulties of surrendering. This doesn't mean I stop fighting, it means I must fight more, harder, and more often. Respect the process. There is beauty in the struggle. The more I learn and grow the more I realize, God is most glorified through the struggle not necessarily the conclusion.
To our family and friends that surrounded us with love during this time, Thank you so much!! We were showered with food, comfort, and prayer. It's a beautiful thing to see the body of Christ at work and it's humbling to know it's working for me. I am so glad this information didn't stay private. How can people pray for what they don't know? How can a need be met that isn't first expressed? It opened the door for us to be loved on, and boy did people step up!
To my child, I want you to know:
Just because you weren't planned on, doesn't mean we weren't excited.
And,
Just because you were never held, kissed, or cuddled, doesn't mean you weren't loved.
And,
Just because we don't even have a picture of you, doesn't mean we wont remember you.
My children teach me things about myself and God all the time. Who would have thought a child I will never know may have taught me the greatest thing yet:
To think that every year when we celebrate my daughters birthday, I will also have an amazing reminder that these kids are a gift. Something for me to treasure, not control....and no matter what happens in life: God doesn't waste anything!
Sunday, April 13, 2014
Why we're not celebrating Easter this year.
I ran into Target to grab some pull-ups the other day, and I was bombarded with a sea of pastels, eggs, and bunny ears. My first reaction was relief that spring is finally here. As I scanned the bins of cheap sunglasses and hello kitty coloring books, I soon became angry, angry that my saviors death and resurrection had been cheapened to sand toys and sugar coated marshmallows. He suffered not an easy death to conquer it forever and this is what it's come to? This is how we "celebrate"? Quickly enough the voice of reason kicked in and anger turned to pity. Really, my heart is saddened for those who don't know the shear joy that is only possible through this holiday.
This holiday is set apart from any other.
My life is only worth living because of this holiday.
This holiday defines my existence.
And really, there's just no room for a fluffy bunny after all that.
I spoke with my husband and that's when we decided, we're not celebrating Easter this year. We're celebrating Christ's resurrection. Now, you may just think I'm playing with words but really I'm not. I find it interesting that the word "Easter" has been adopted and accepted while the word "Christmas" has not. We have holiday parties now, remember? We send out holiday cards too. While some people spend their time getting upset by this, it kind of makes me happy. There's something sacred still left in the word "Christmas", something that means when people aren't willing to accept Christ they aren't willing to accept Christmas. I can understand that. Now, with Easter it's changed. The world has been adopted the world has changed it into what it wants. Don't believe me? Go walk around target. Do you see the word Easter? You will. Take a look through the sale flyers. Do you see the word Easter? You will. So, no, I don't believe I'm playing with words. Out with "Easter", you can have it. This holiday means so much more. It's about a righteous man, who suffered on my behave, conquered death for all mankind, and LIVES so I can as well.
We never have done the whole Easter bunny thing at our house, but our kids would get a small basket full of goodies on Easter morning. We normally do some small egg hunt as well. This year will be different. This holiday means so much to us, we're going to be celebrating all week long. This week every ounce of energy I have, every story read, every creative crafty moment that we have will point us to the cross. No eggs, no chicks, no bunnies. THE CROSS. On Resurrection morning (not Easter remember) our kids will come down to the breakfast table and waiting for them will be a scripture stone (because my kids are obsessed with all things little that could be a "treasure"), a carefully picked out book from the Christian book store, and a cross necklace. That's it. No peeps, no jelly beans, no sidewalk chalk. Just a few little reminders that we can only live because HE does.
Have no fear, our Resurrection celebration isn't going to end there this year. This is it remember? The entire reason for our existence. It's worth two weeks. The next week we are going to be focusing on new life. The new life that comes through Christ. As we celebrate new life we'll talk about how spring is a time of new birth. Flowers and animals this time of year are a great example of the new life that's available after the resurrection. We'll do some fun "new life" crafts and there may even by some pastel m&m's and jelly beans involved, because 1. Candy is fun and 2. It'll all be on sale.
Our hope is, our children will hold this holiday with reverence not just excitement. Our prayer is as they grow they will also become nauseated walking through target thinking about how many people just have no idea the joy and life that's available to them only through Christ, and that this truth will motivate them to live out their faith in every moment of their life.
Can you have fun with Easter and the Resurrection? Sure. I believe some people do it better than others. And, I would encourage you to ask yourself why your children get excited about the holiday. I don't know about you, but if I'm 4 years old, I'm more excited about candy and flip flops than a story I've heard a million times. I taught 3 year old Sunday School this morning and we took a 5 minute detour because when the word "Easter" was said, a little boy started jumping up and down because the "Easter bunny is coming". We're trying to be very intentional this year to display the beauty and mystery of the cross mixed with the wonder and joy of the resurrection without any other distractions.
Because, there really was a man named Jesus. He really walked this very earth. He really did suffer tremendously for nothing that he did. He really did die for me. He really did conquer death once and for all. He really did raise again in 3 days. He really does sit at the right hand of God. And, that is REALLY a reason to celebrate!
Monday, March 24, 2014
Can laundry really bring glory to God?
As I stood looking at the heaping mound of clothing that lay In front of me waiting to be neatly folded and put in its proper place, i couldnt help but think how food droppings, dirty hand marks, and just plain dirt on these very clothes would meet me again in a day or so. Then, Steven Curtis Chapman's song "Do Everything" popped into my head. The chorus says something like this, "Do every little thing to the glory of the one who made you". So as I starred at the laundry I couldn't help but think, "Can I really do laundry to the glory of God?"
I prayed for God to right my wrong attitude and I told Him I wanted to do this trival little task for Him. Honestly though my real thoughts were, "Does God really care about laundry?" I picked up a pair of pants and shook them out and kept thinking. I realized, the absence of complaining does not equal bringing glory to God. I began a pile for my son by setting down the folded pair of pants. As I held up my daughters dress, something came over me and I began praying for her. I prayed for her tiny heart to be sensitive to the word of God and eager to follow him throughout her life. Then I picked up my husbands t-shirt and prayed that God would give him strength to stand firm with his values and beliefs in a corporate bag stabbing world that encourages anything but. I continued to pray over my family as I touched each piece of clothing. Soon I was scrapping the bottom of the laundry basket. I can't explain the emense amount of joy I felt when I was done. Somehow this mundane everyday task was suddenly joyful an rooted in deep purpose.
I'm going to do everything I can to make this a habit. I don't know about your house but laundry is kind of a given. Everyday we put on new clothes and take off old ones. What an amazing opprotunity I have to lift my family up in prayer.
I am convinced more than ever the answer is yes! God does care about laundry. And yes, you can bring glory to God while doing the mundane tasks of life. It's not just the presence of a good attitude either, it's taking a moment to praise Him, to ask of Him, to simply talk to Him.
Suddenly, there can be beauty everywhere!
So go ahead. Go fold your laundry, wipe the noses, mop the floor, prep for dinner......do it, and do it to the glory of God!
Here's Steven Curtis Chapman's song:
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uVTeIMursb8
I prayed for God to right my wrong attitude and I told Him I wanted to do this trival little task for Him. Honestly though my real thoughts were, "Does God really care about laundry?" I picked up a pair of pants and shook them out and kept thinking. I realized, the absence of complaining does not equal bringing glory to God. I began a pile for my son by setting down the folded pair of pants. As I held up my daughters dress, something came over me and I began praying for her. I prayed for her tiny heart to be sensitive to the word of God and eager to follow him throughout her life. Then I picked up my husbands t-shirt and prayed that God would give him strength to stand firm with his values and beliefs in a corporate bag stabbing world that encourages anything but. I continued to pray over my family as I touched each piece of clothing. Soon I was scrapping the bottom of the laundry basket. I can't explain the emense amount of joy I felt when I was done. Somehow this mundane everyday task was suddenly joyful an rooted in deep purpose.
I'm going to do everything I can to make this a habit. I don't know about your house but laundry is kind of a given. Everyday we put on new clothes and take off old ones. What an amazing opprotunity I have to lift my family up in prayer.
I am convinced more than ever the answer is yes! God does care about laundry. And yes, you can bring glory to God while doing the mundane tasks of life. It's not just the presence of a good attitude either, it's taking a moment to praise Him, to ask of Him, to simply talk to Him.
Suddenly, there can be beauty everywhere!
So go ahead. Go fold your laundry, wipe the noses, mop the floor, prep for dinner......do it, and do it to the glory of God!
Here's Steven Curtis Chapman's song:
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=uVTeIMursb8
Wednesday, January 29, 2014
Remember
Between the head colds and the literal cold outside, we've been cooped up in the house for the past few days. As the kids go stir crazy, I have to admit I'm not far behind them. I believe these words recently came out of my mouth, "The next person to yell at someone else will put on their shoes and run a lap around the house in the snow." So before I lay down tape in our living room and make my children run suicides (remember those?), I removed myself from the house (or my husband came home and saw the "I might physically harm the next person to speak" look on my face and he sent me out) and I'm sitting at Panera bread taking time to tell myself to remember.
Remember.
Remember when you would lay awake at night thinking about how amazing it would be to have a family.
Remember when you got engaged and realized you found the man that you wanted to make that dream a reality with.
Remember when even though you were young when you would hold a baby, that sour milk and baby lotion smell would make you weak at the knees.
Remember how excited you were the first time you peed on the stick and saw two lines instead of one. (and the second time and the third!)
Remember when you were light headed, puking, and couldn't sit or stand without help yet all you could do was smile at your baby.
Remember the first real reciprocated smile.
Remember upset little ones that can only be comforted by your arms.
Remember how peaceful they look while they sleep.
Remember the joy of teaching things like manners and watching them be used.
Remember it matters. What you do matters!
Remember your children are a God given gift. It's a divine privilege to guide, instruct, and love them everyday.
Remember its just a phase and they'll grow out of it. Whatever it is its just a phase and as soon as you figure it out they'll be on to something new for you fret about.
Remember tickle fights and belly laughs.
Remember a quick "help" prayer is always answered an always does help.
Remember the special hugs that only little hands and arms can give.
Remember everyday there's a mother that due to illness, tragedy, or infertility is without a child. She would love to be up all night with coughs and deal all day will fighting.
Remember being a mother is one of the hardest most important thing you will ever do.
Remember! Most importantly, remember years from now these will be days you look back on and REMEMBER!
Remember.
Remember when you would lay awake at night thinking about how amazing it would be to have a family.
Remember when you got engaged and realized you found the man that you wanted to make that dream a reality with.
Remember when even though you were young when you would hold a baby, that sour milk and baby lotion smell would make you weak at the knees.
Remember how excited you were the first time you peed on the stick and saw two lines instead of one. (and the second time and the third!)
Remember when you were light headed, puking, and couldn't sit or stand without help yet all you could do was smile at your baby.
Remember the first real reciprocated smile.
Remember upset little ones that can only be comforted by your arms.
Remember how peaceful they look while they sleep.
Remember the joy of teaching things like manners and watching them be used.
Remember it matters. What you do matters!
Remember your children are a God given gift. It's a divine privilege to guide, instruct, and love them everyday.
Remember its just a phase and they'll grow out of it. Whatever it is its just a phase and as soon as you figure it out they'll be on to something new for you fret about.
Remember tickle fights and belly laughs.
Remember a quick "help" prayer is always answered an always does help.
Remember the special hugs that only little hands and arms can give.
Remember everyday there's a mother that due to illness, tragedy, or infertility is without a child. She would love to be up all night with coughs and deal all day will fighting.
Remember being a mother is one of the hardest most important thing you will ever do.
Remember! Most importantly, remember years from now these will be days you look back on and REMEMBER!
Monday, January 6, 2014
Just do it!
It's done!
Christmas is over, our move is complete, and its time to get back to our "normal crazy" instead of the crazy crazy that was the month of December! Our Internet isn't connected yet so I'm typing this on my phone which means it'll be a short one I'm sure full of errors.
I busted myself this weekend finishing up organizing, making one last purge of anything I could, and prepping to start school again. School took a backseat through moving over the holidays, which is ok because you know what? I can do that!
In this afternoon coffee moment ,that is surprising quiet filled as the kids play upstairs, I'm at great peace. I've accomplished so much today and I feel great. We hit the ground running early and accomplished 2 1/2 hours of hard core school by 11:00. We ran errands, did laundry, mopped floors, cleaned bathrooms, wrote a large sum of emails concerning the weeks activities, made some phone calls related to the move which are always fun, and finished up my Bible study for tomorrow. It's 3:30 and I'm feeling good!
Then I realized. Do you know why I'm feeling good? It really has nothing to do with the crossed off to do list, the happily playing children, or the cup of coffee in front of me. It's because this morning as I ate my breakfast I had some sweet time with The Lord. I opened the work of God and was filled. Then I gave my day over to Him, I asked Him to use today for His glory. Before we sang one song, read one book, or did one lesson my children and I opened their Bible and read from it. Then we did a mini study on stealing (just the next trait word not something we're having a problem with), then we all prayed over our day and each of the kids picked a prayer stick that had someone's name in it to pray for.
Today worked because we gave it to God first. I wish I could say we're good at starting every day like this one, but truth be told we fail miserably. However, being able to pinpoint why I feel so filled has me motivated to do it again tomorrow. Around here that's about as far as I can go.....tomorrow. But you know what? If I do it tomorrow that will help motivate me for the next day and so on. I ache for the discipline to not be able to do anything until I've had my time with God.
I don't know how you started your day today, but info know that tomorrow's coming around. I just wanted to encouraged anyone I could to try it, do it, or keep doing it.
It'll make all the difference. Even during the not so productive days......
Christmas is over, our move is complete, and its time to get back to our "normal crazy" instead of the crazy crazy that was the month of December! Our Internet isn't connected yet so I'm typing this on my phone which means it'll be a short one I'm sure full of errors.
I busted myself this weekend finishing up organizing, making one last purge of anything I could, and prepping to start school again. School took a backseat through moving over the holidays, which is ok because you know what? I can do that!
In this afternoon coffee moment ,that is surprising quiet filled as the kids play upstairs, I'm at great peace. I've accomplished so much today and I feel great. We hit the ground running early and accomplished 2 1/2 hours of hard core school by 11:00. We ran errands, did laundry, mopped floors, cleaned bathrooms, wrote a large sum of emails concerning the weeks activities, made some phone calls related to the move which are always fun, and finished up my Bible study for tomorrow. It's 3:30 and I'm feeling good!
Then I realized. Do you know why I'm feeling good? It really has nothing to do with the crossed off to do list, the happily playing children, or the cup of coffee in front of me. It's because this morning as I ate my breakfast I had some sweet time with The Lord. I opened the work of God and was filled. Then I gave my day over to Him, I asked Him to use today for His glory. Before we sang one song, read one book, or did one lesson my children and I opened their Bible and read from it. Then we did a mini study on stealing (just the next trait word not something we're having a problem with), then we all prayed over our day and each of the kids picked a prayer stick that had someone's name in it to pray for.
Today worked because we gave it to God first. I wish I could say we're good at starting every day like this one, but truth be told we fail miserably. However, being able to pinpoint why I feel so filled has me motivated to do it again tomorrow. Around here that's about as far as I can go.....tomorrow. But you know what? If I do it tomorrow that will help motivate me for the next day and so on. I ache for the discipline to not be able to do anything until I've had my time with God.
I don't know how you started your day today, but info know that tomorrow's coming around. I just wanted to encouraged anyone I could to try it, do it, or keep doing it.
It'll make all the difference. Even during the not so productive days......
Monday, December 9, 2013
Minimize to Magnify
The month of December always has the tendency to fly by at wicked speed leaving us feeling frazzled instead of filled like its supposed to. I have become determined not to let this happen, but this year there's one more thing being thrown into the mix. We're moving right after Christmas! Yes, we're a little bit crazy, but to be honest, I'm not at all surprised. We have a tendency to do things this way, and I've also learned to go with the flow and try not to stress too much. You know what? This move will happen even if I stop packing to read books and even if I put down the label maker and we load up the car to go look at Christmas lights.....I can sleep in January!
On my quest to not flip out (because lets face it, that always one step away), I have to constantly remind myself what this move represents. This will be our 7th move in our 9 years of marriage. I've made good friends with my favorite moving buddy: the Jumbo Sharpie marker. This move, however is different. This move is not about bigger and better. Even when we lived in a tiny apartment the move was about sacrifice to get to the bigger and better. But, this move is about simplifying, reprioritizing, and minimalizing.
We lived in downtown Chicago for 6 years, so we're no strangers to small living spaces. I didn't however realize how much I liked it until we had much more. Not only liked it, but how much we need a smaller living space. This big amazing house that I'm sitting in right now has been great to us these past 2 years. We've been able to open up our house to Bible studies, youth events, and many church gatherings. We have also made dear friends with our neighbors. I will greatly miss the "I haven't showered for 2 days but need a coffee playdate" relationship that we have. I'm so grateful for our time here, but its also provided something unexpected: perspective.
When you have a school room, a playroom, a rec room, and two kids bedrooms that just equals a whole lot of space that is mostly just used to sit a whole lot of stuff that is mostly just not used. And, what do kids do? Make messes. I'm all for it really I am. I love that my kids make airplanes and pretend to fly to Grammy's house, and "Camp out" under the stars that requires every blanket and pillow in the house. Here's the problem: when one area of the house gets to messy to play they just move to the next area. Why wouldn't they? Sometimes I do the same thing. I'd prefer to not look at the stack of laundry so I'll conveniently spend my day on the other end of the house.
Also, big house = big cleaning day. I could clean my condo in Chicago in an afternoon. I'm lucky if I tackle a quarter of this house in an afternoon. The bigger our house the more time and energy we devote to filling it, decorating it, cleaning it, and maintaining it. All of a sudden we don't own our things; they own us. I love it when God convicts my husband and I of the same thing at the same time. It's great confirmation and makes the decisions that much more easy.
It's not just about the stuff. I haven't mentioned that word that plagues us all, yet we love to love it: Money. We had about 2 weeks to find a place when we moved here and I still believe we made the right decision at the time. However, living here has meant we've been living right at our means. Not above it ,we make sure we're not doing that, but not below it either. Well, living right at your means can only mean one thing. We have very little freedom with our money. This has been a thorn in our side for years quite honestly, but for the first time ever, we're taking drastic steps to gain that freedom back. We thought we've been doing good. We don't have cable, we don't go on extravagant vacations, my husband drives a car he needs to start with a hammer about once a week, and we don't overspend on the extras like going out to eat. Having financial freedom on one income is possible. There was just one more big thing we needed to change and that was our housing.
So, we're downsizing. Considerably. We're very excited about this and I'm praying the new year will bring a new perspective that becomes a new normal for our family.
Our kids will all share a room, which is fine because they're old enough it'll work and young enough to think it's still fun. We all will be giving up things we enjoy. My husband looses the hot tub that he uses every day, we will no longer have a school room, and there is no luxury of keeping the pickle jar for the pinterest project I swear I will get to one day. My days have been spent purging and organizing and purging again. Craigslist is my best friend and the salvation army has had a severe increase of donations this past month. As I've gone through my house I have to admit I feel foolish for even having all this stuff. We're far from hoarders and yet I'm shocked how many bags of trash I've filled. Not worthy selling or being given away simply just JUNK! We don't want our life full of junk and full of stress to figure out how to pay for the place to keep the junk.
No, we want freedom! Freedom to meet a need when we see it without having to think about money. Freedom to obey God instantly when he calls us to do something. When God says "Jump!" we want to say "How high?"
When or if God says "Adopt", we want to say "Yes"
When or if God says "Go", we want to say "Yes"
When God says "Give", we want to say "Yes"
And, not just "Yes we want to" but "Yes we're ready now!"
So, as I'm going nutty over here preparing for and preserving the glory of the Christmas season and packing and getting rid of things, I need to constantly remind myself it's for a greater cause. We're minimizing our stuff so we can minimize ourselves to Magnify the Creator and giver of all good things. (Which is all we really NEED anyway.)
**Disclaimer: Not everyone needs to do what we're doing. We needed to take drastic steps to make sure our outcome was as drastic as we want. However, I do encourage everyone to take the time to evaluate where you are with stuff. Do you have the freedom you want? What would it take to get there? The lights and glitz of Christmas will be over and boxed up far too soon and with that comes a new year, it can be a new clean start for whatever you need it to be.
On my quest to not flip out (because lets face it, that always one step away), I have to constantly remind myself what this move represents. This will be our 7th move in our 9 years of marriage. I've made good friends with my favorite moving buddy: the Jumbo Sharpie marker. This move, however is different. This move is not about bigger and better. Even when we lived in a tiny apartment the move was about sacrifice to get to the bigger and better. But, this move is about simplifying, reprioritizing, and minimalizing.
We lived in downtown Chicago for 6 years, so we're no strangers to small living spaces. I didn't however realize how much I liked it until we had much more. Not only liked it, but how much we need a smaller living space. This big amazing house that I'm sitting in right now has been great to us these past 2 years. We've been able to open up our house to Bible studies, youth events, and many church gatherings. We have also made dear friends with our neighbors. I will greatly miss the "I haven't showered for 2 days but need a coffee playdate" relationship that we have. I'm so grateful for our time here, but its also provided something unexpected: perspective.
When you have a school room, a playroom, a rec room, and two kids bedrooms that just equals a whole lot of space that is mostly just used to sit a whole lot of stuff that is mostly just not used. And, what do kids do? Make messes. I'm all for it really I am. I love that my kids make airplanes and pretend to fly to Grammy's house, and "Camp out" under the stars that requires every blanket and pillow in the house. Here's the problem: when one area of the house gets to messy to play they just move to the next area. Why wouldn't they? Sometimes I do the same thing. I'd prefer to not look at the stack of laundry so I'll conveniently spend my day on the other end of the house.
Also, big house = big cleaning day. I could clean my condo in Chicago in an afternoon. I'm lucky if I tackle a quarter of this house in an afternoon. The bigger our house the more time and energy we devote to filling it, decorating it, cleaning it, and maintaining it. All of a sudden we don't own our things; they own us. I love it when God convicts my husband and I of the same thing at the same time. It's great confirmation and makes the decisions that much more easy.
It's not just about the stuff. I haven't mentioned that word that plagues us all, yet we love to love it: Money. We had about 2 weeks to find a place when we moved here and I still believe we made the right decision at the time. However, living here has meant we've been living right at our means. Not above it ,we make sure we're not doing that, but not below it either. Well, living right at your means can only mean one thing. We have very little freedom with our money. This has been a thorn in our side for years quite honestly, but for the first time ever, we're taking drastic steps to gain that freedom back. We thought we've been doing good. We don't have cable, we don't go on extravagant vacations, my husband drives a car he needs to start with a hammer about once a week, and we don't overspend on the extras like going out to eat. Having financial freedom on one income is possible. There was just one more big thing we needed to change and that was our housing.
So, we're downsizing. Considerably. We're very excited about this and I'm praying the new year will bring a new perspective that becomes a new normal for our family.
Our kids will all share a room, which is fine because they're old enough it'll work and young enough to think it's still fun. We all will be giving up things we enjoy. My husband looses the hot tub that he uses every day, we will no longer have a school room, and there is no luxury of keeping the pickle jar for the pinterest project I swear I will get to one day. My days have been spent purging and organizing and purging again. Craigslist is my best friend and the salvation army has had a severe increase of donations this past month. As I've gone through my house I have to admit I feel foolish for even having all this stuff. We're far from hoarders and yet I'm shocked how many bags of trash I've filled. Not worthy selling or being given away simply just JUNK! We don't want our life full of junk and full of stress to figure out how to pay for the place to keep the junk.
No, we want freedom! Freedom to meet a need when we see it without having to think about money. Freedom to obey God instantly when he calls us to do something. When God says "Jump!" we want to say "How high?"
When or if God says "Adopt", we want to say "Yes"
When or if God says "Go", we want to say "Yes"
When God says "Give", we want to say "Yes"
And, not just "Yes we want to" but "Yes we're ready now!"
So, as I'm going nutty over here preparing for and preserving the glory of the Christmas season and packing and getting rid of things, I need to constantly remind myself it's for a greater cause. We're minimizing our stuff so we can minimize ourselves to Magnify the Creator and giver of all good things. (Which is all we really NEED anyway.)
**Disclaimer: Not everyone needs to do what we're doing. We needed to take drastic steps to make sure our outcome was as drastic as we want. However, I do encourage everyone to take the time to evaluate where you are with stuff. Do you have the freedom you want? What would it take to get there? The lights and glitz of Christmas will be over and boxed up far too soon and with that comes a new year, it can be a new clean start for whatever you need it to be.
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