Recently, I've been asked by many friends and family members why we've chosen not to do Santa Claus with our kids. It's forced me to ask myself some hard questions to validate what we do and why.
I grew up celebrating Christmas without Santa Claus, and I knew that when I had kids I would do the same. Before my husband and I had children we discussed and decided how we would approach the topic. Growing up without Santa, I didn't even know if I could bring myself to do it, and my husband had his own disappointing experience of "finding out the truth" (as do many) so the decision was easy for us.
As our children are getting older and we're having to explain more and more, and as people start asking us questions it's forced us to really know why. Not just, "This is how I grew up, so this is how I'll do it." But really why?
Here are some of our reasons:
-We want our children to know without a doubt, what we tell them is true. If I spend the first few years of their lives telling them Santa Claus is real and going great lengths to reinforce it, when they find out it was all a game, will they start to question other things that I tell them are true? Like Jesus? Was that part real, or just a story too?
-We try to be on guard when introducing mythical magical characters in general. We want their hearts to be as sensitive as possible to the true miraculous stories of Christ. I've already noticed my daughter not being that impressed with stories like the feeding of the five thousand or Jesus raising a little girl from the dead. It's made me think. I guess if everything is bippity-boppity-boo'd into existence in her world (it's everywhere from sesame street to Disney) it would be hard to be impressed with the real deal. If reindeer can fly and a fat man comes down every chimney in the world in one night what's the big deal with calming a storm?
-Telling our children that they will get presents for being good and nothing for being bad (not like ANYONE actually does this) is the exact opposite of what we're trying to teach them. Good deeds equal good things? We ALL know life doesn't work like this. I know many very "Good" people that go through horrifically hard times. And, Salvation definitely doesn't work like this. No. We want them to learn things like grace and unconditional love. God gave us the gift of Jesus and on Christmas one way we can celebrate this is by giving gifts to each other. Not because of how good my children are but simply because we love them.
-Less talk about Santa, the more we can talk about Christ. Easier said than done. These of course are our intentions but it is hard to continuously point our children towards the manger with all the commercialization of the holiday. It's hard to continuously point myself toward the manger....better start there!
So what DO we do with Santa?
In our house he's not taboo. Santa Claus is a character just like Dora and Cinderella. It's fun to read the stories and watch classic holiday movies, all the while reminding our children that it is exactly what it seems: Fictional. We do however talk about the real Saint Nicolas and make it a good reminder to share our blessings with people less fortunate.
Doesn't this take away from the magic of Christmas?
Um....NOPE. If you could come into our home and see our kids jumping up and down at the thought of Christmas and all it brings you would know they're really just as excited as any other Santa believing kid.
In all reality my daughter kind of thinks it's fun to know something her friends don't (as did I when I was little). We've only had one issue of her announcing to her Mops class that Santa isn't real, but really all it took was a conversation and she's good. (I didn't think I needed to do that in October, but apparently Christmas gets to the minds of a child before it gets to Target!) The talk I had with her this year did raise some very interesting moments. My daughter doesn't understand why parents would lie to their kids. Something about the appalled look on her face was all the validation that I needed that we're doing the right thing for us.
With some of the questions I've been asked recently, I decided to write about what we do NOT to try to persuade every reader to do exactly as us, but to encourage you to think about a few things. Why do you celebrate Christmas the way you do? What are your convictions?Is it just because that's how you did it when you were a kid? Maybe you need to ask some hard questions like I had to.
Side note:
Some of my favorite simple things that help point is towards the manger during the holiday season is:
-the movie the Crippled Lamb based on the Max Lucado book. (My daughter loves it so much, it's one of her favorites to watch all year long.)
-The fisher price nativity set. My parents go it for the kids a few years ago and they love getting it out and acting out the Christmas story.
-Using an advent Calendar. We like to do a different one every year.
